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Hello, peeps! Good night y'all. How's your raya?
I have been staying at home all day long.
It's cold here since it was raining since morning
and only just stopped in the evening.
Tonight post will be something I have been thinking for weeks.
So, enjoy your reading time and don't forget to leave a comment!

A friend said, a doctor won't treats his or her patients are all same. It's all based on their condition, disease and necessity. I repeated this words in my mind for many times. Even though I had it stopped, it would came back after awhile. Along with that, I was thinking how we human normally demand for something equal. Something similar. We claim that is how being fair means. However, I had another thought. I have been noticed this since I was a child which we human were used to lie and we're still. This includes someone who are not really good at lying or simply bad at it. I don't mind about this one behavior of us. But what do I mind is how we use it.

As a person as well as a friend, I won't ask in regret "Why don't you treat me just like the way I treat you?". Instead of that, I ask in disappointment "I hope you just simply appreciate my existence". I don't ask for a payback. I simply ask for a "Thank you". In term of relationship between human, I think I can get use to three kinds. Firstly, I can be a friend to someone who need someone to listen to him or her. Secondly, I can be a friend to someone who just simply want to get to know each other. Thirdly, I can be a friend with benefits. Just in one condition, don't lie.

Firstly, I can be a friend to someone who need someone to listen to him or her. I would be glad if this kind of person approaches me with this kind of purpose. However, it would be better if this person comes without any other decorations like pretending to get close to me or does something sort of special that he or she never does before. If you believe me, just come to me and I will get my ears as well as my heart ready. You don't have to pretend or create any unnecessary lies and then suddenly left without trace. We don't have to get close to listen to each other.

Secondly, I can be a friend to someone who just simply want to get to know each other. I appreciate this kind of approach. Getting to know someone is like widen my knowledge and understanding over people. It's true and pure. However, if you come with hidden hopeful purpose like to make me a girlfriend or something else more, to me this kind of relationship is more serious and challenging because I will start to consider your feeling. It is also a challenge to me when i can sense a fake appearance of someone who intend to get to know me. I will start thinking if this person is actually not confident or just simply don't trust me. I don't need a mistrustful relationship.

Thirdly, I can be a friend with benefits. However, just so you know, I can make you my benefits too. I don't have prejudice over relationship with taking advantages as long as it's fair for both sides. What we called a toxic relationship is when it is all one sided and it's more like parasite than a mutual. I hope a person who approaches me with this kind of purpose would make it clear and no running around the bushes. I'm a warm person if you get to know me quite long but I'm also a cold person from the start and I'm always do.

At my side, I don't have to know someone's name just so I can pay my attention to that someone. As long as I want, I will. If I want to listen, I will. If I want to get to know someone or something, I will. If I want to let you benefit me, I will benefit you too. It's not simply a give and take operation but a comprimise act. Even if it is a fail, it is not completely fails. It is just another lesson. Start a greeting, give a help, make a business deal, there are more example of comprimise act.

How can I came out with these thoughts? It was when i realized that I have been always wanting something mutual. Something true even if it is far from logic. 5 does not only made of 3 plus 2, but also 1 plus 4, 10 divide 2, 5 multiply 1, square root of 25 and etc. Life itself applies the same formula to us. How something that we have do not belong to others, and so what they have may not ours too. It's not like we are given with something unequally but it's just simply in different way. Bukan tak sama. Tapi sama rata.

I know this post is kind of all over the places.
Well, that's just our human brain does things together with its best friend, emotions.
Until here, I put an end of this post. No offend. Just simply a personal thought.
Thank you for your time reading this until its last line.
See ya =)

Allah tak beri semua sama. Allah beri semua sama rata. Alhamdulillah.



we're all stars that brightens each other starlight a little bit better for the better -07/05/2020-