So Poetic Today

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Assalamualaikum...
Image result for sunrise image scene

Hello, peeps! I back again. Haha
Nak share sikit apa yang jadi hari ni.
So yeah, I am so poetic today.

Tengah hari tadi ada presentation.
And I didn't prepared anything for my speech.
Farahin sebut je la apa yang Farahin tahu and
apa yang Farahin conteng dekat slides yang Farahin buat. Haha

It was a presentation for a poem.
An assessment. For sure, have mark.
Farahin pilih poem with title
Still I Rise by Maya Angelou.

Firstly, of course Farahin tak tahu apa2 about this poet.
Even Farahin ni pun suka berpuisi at times,
but for sure I am not a bookworm. Hehe
So as I went through about her,
I at least knew some little things about her.
Either fact or fake, still an information.
Kind a new knowledge to me.

Jadi for this presentation we had to recite the poem.
So yeah. I did. Clearly. With cold feet.
And didn't expected,
my voice cracked as I reached at the second last stanza.
Almost cry but I didn't.
But still, it was quite epic to me. Haha
Never felt that way before just because reciting a poem.

Farahin rasa I really put my mind and soul masa baca poem tu.
I might not know all about Maya that she tried to convey in this poem.
But I knew how this poem really mean to me.
As I recited it line by line, stanza by stanza,
rasa macam semua pahit hidup Farahin was unfolded.
It was painful and wonderful at the same time.

Well, semua orang ada life experience masing2.
Mahu kecil atau besar.
And there were bitter things that happened to me
mungkin tak besar mana bagi orang lain
tapi besar bagi Farahin,

Those bitter things that happened,
sebenarnya betul2 ubah Farahin sepanjang 21 tahun ni.
It changed, how I look at the world.
It changed, how I look at people around me.
It changed, how I approach the others.
It changed, how I look at myself.
How should I educate 'her'.
It almost changed everything.

So I think I really take a like to this poem.
To end this 'so poetic' post,
here is the second last stanza
that pleaded for my tears today.
Thank you for your times, peeps =)

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.






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Triggered

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Assalamualaikum...
Image result for lonely images

Hi, peeps! Long time not posting ha.
Well direct je dengan tajuk post hari ni.
Triggered. Yes. I was triggered.

Now Farahin dah masuk tahun 3.
Yup. Senior Year.
Lecturer banyak sentuh pasal alam pekerjaan.
Dah tak ada manja-manja or main suap-suap.
Again. I was triggered.

Farahin dah nampak jalan nak menuju ke alam pekerjaan tu.
Tapi Farahin still tak nampak apa yang ada kat depan sana.
Gelap dan buat seriau je.
Yes. My comfort zone was triggered.

Angan-angan yang previously macam hangat-hangat taik ayam
now macam ada bau hangit-hangit gitu.
Buat Farahin tak senang duduk.
Someone would say,
eloklah comfort zone tu triggered.
Kiranya masih ada harapan.
But i am not feeling really good here.

Talking about being professional
gave me emotional impact.
Farahin ragu-ragu dengan diri sendiri.
Somehow I feel like I have nothing to show off.
Yet I know I have something.

Bila Introvert asyik disebut-sebut
macam virus liar berjangkit oleh lecturer,
Farahin rasa a bit down.
Yes. I am an introvert.
Half of my life till today,
I was struggling to not
let my introvert side being show.
Yet tahulah ada masanya kita pun rasa penat.
Kadang-kadang kita rasa macam hipokrit.

But you know,
Farahin tak buat semua ni sebab desperate.
It just I want to teach myself something. Slowly.
But never expect that it would be very long.
Somehow, I am lost here.


how many lies, how many acts
that i have to keep, just to be in contact


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Salam Aidilfitri Maaf Zahir Batin!-06/06/2019-