Childhood Prompts

Bismillah . Assalamualaikum . . .

Hello , peeps ! Afternoon , everyone . Dah lama sangat tak ke sini kan . Rindu rindu rindu rindu . Have my fingers dancing on the keyboard memang tak pernah tak satisfying . Teringin nak post satu kali after lama menghilang but I'm not sure nak tulis apa . Bukan tak ada idea tapi banyak sangat kata-kata yang tak terluah di kepala . Jadinya Farahin decide to come back with journal prompts ! Hehe

What made me doubting myself as a kid ?

Be laughingstock because of my look .

Who was the first person who made I feel insecure ?

Teacher .

Letter to my parent with everything I want to say to them

I have lots to say but let's just skip this .

What is something my younger self would be surprised about me now ?

I have interest in science (even though I didn't excel the subject at school and I hated it during primary school lol)

What was one time I remember feeling wronged as a child ? How did I react ? Has this affected me in adulthood ? If so , how ?

Teacher be sarcastic about my hair which I decorated with colorful little clips , in front of whole class . I felt ashamed and stopped decorating my hair , from simple ponytail everyday to slowly wearing tudung out of feeling uncomfortable about my hair . Adult me rarely wear female clothes , don't do make up , not fond of jewelries and accessories , feel uncomfortable to wear such things for a long time in public . I love my gender natural style but I'm aware that there is unpleasant root about it too .

What did my childhood me need the most ?

Emotional support .

What was I like as a child ?

It's hard to elaborate this , my mind starts throwing mess . I skip .

Is there a part of my childhood self I've lost touch with and want back ?

Skip .

What would I tell a younger version of yourself ?

Not now . Skip .

Which part of my childhood trigger me ? Why ?

7 to 11 years old - Bully , 15 to 17 years old - Relationship issue , 19 to 20 years old - Adjustmet disorder (undiagnosed) , 23 to 25 years old - Severe mental illness . Now , that's very TMI .

Pheww I knew this would be deep and challenging to my mind and heart , yet I picked it anyway . Dah tak kuat nak tulis long closing . Apapun , thank you for your time and visit ! I appreciate that you still noticed this blog . See ya again .

Your mistake stays in your past . But it stays in my  present .
Don't let your child repeats the same mistake , millenials . Please .