Mawar Delima

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Mawar Delima
merah merona laksana senja
wangian yang menjadi dambaan
duri-durinya tajam

Mawar Delima
disentuh, dipegang
apabila diri terluka
jarum menjadi tuduhan

Mawar Delima
ingin aku melarikan diri
tak mahu hati diracuni
enggan disakiti

Mawar Delima
hatiku masih di sini
mataku masih memerhati
aku merapatkan diri
engkau yang tidak termiliki

Someone knocked the door. But I answered nothing. Shall I let he in?


ELFiction: Love With Colours -Yesung-

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You’re a quiet person. You love to put yourself away from public. At school, the field is the most favourite place for you to spend more time with yourself with a white canvas and colours. Painting is your hobby. Nature is like a friend for you.

One fine day, while you were enjoyed painting, a guy approached and sat beside you. That guy was no other than Yesung, your classmate. This guy used to disturb and trouble you at some. You never know what was the reason he acted like that to you but some ‘friends’ said that he likes you.

“Yah! Don’t you feel boring?”

You sighed and rolled your eyes. You wished Yesung wouldn’t ever appear in your life. Unfortunately, he already has.

“Geez! Your drawing is so awful” Yesung said.

You ignored to his words and wanted to leave in hurry. You put the colours and brushes backed to his case. Then Yesung came to lend his hand. You said nothing but deep in your heart, you hate to see that guy touched your things. In that case, you accidentally splashed the water in a cup that has mixed with colours onto Yesung shirt. You were shocked as same as Yesung. However, you said nothing and just leave him just like that.

“Aishh, jinjja. What’s wrong with this girl. Yah! Don’t you know how to say sorry?”

You kept ignoring each word from Yesung.

It had been very late since you had your tuition class after school. The sky already dark and the moon already showed itself. You hugged an empty canvas tightly in your arms and bravely walked in dark under the lights of the street lamps.

Suddenly, you felt like someone was following you from back. You make your steps slow and turned your back quickly. As you looked behind, there was no one even a shadow. The street was absolutely dark if it was not because of the street lamps lighten the street.

You continued your journey. After a few steps, you saw a group of boys with their bikes were gathering at the left-side of the street. You could smell that they were naughty and bad guys. You looked around you and wished that you were invisible and unseen. Unluckily, you were real. You went through the biker group and suddenly someone grabbed your hand. You were freaking shocked till fall your canvas onto the road.


You closely closed the eyes.

“Yah, it’s me. Yesung.”

You automatically opened your eyes as soon as you heard Yesung’s name. You looked on your left-side and there was Yesung standing just right beside you; holding your hand. You even could feel the warmth of his hand.

“Ssi, are you alright?” A biker came and asked you.

Again, you were shocked and quickly hide yourself behind Yesung. You were just like a cat cling to her master.

“Bwoya? What’re you afraid of?” Yesung asked you. “Nae. She’s fine.” Yesung answered to the biker’s question before the biker backed to his group.

You slowly brought yourself out from Yesung’s back. Your cheeks were blushing out of blue. The face was getting hotter and the forehead started sweating. You took your canvas that had fall onto the road with a shaking hand. You felt embarrassed for what had you done just before.

Your home journey was continued. In the dark under the lights of the street lamps, you then been accompanied by a person, Yesung. You never thought whether it was a coincidence Yesung and you walked on the same road or it was a part of his plan to trouble you. However, you felt relieved because there was someone you knew in your way. But then you thought, why should you feel relieved about that?

You had arrived at your house. At last, your journey was ended. A sigh of relief protruded from your mouth. Then you smiled, felt very thankful for the safe journey even it was a little thrilling. You gently opened the gate and caused a little squeaky sound. As you brought a step into the lawn, suddenly Yesung called you. You stopped and looked at him.

What’s again now?

“Next time – let me accompany you home.”

You said nothing and waited for the next words.

“If you thought that you’re brave enough to walk home alone, I’m too afraid to let you be alone.”

Aish, this punk! Is there something have to do with his brain?

You still couldn’t believe of anything on Yesung’s words.

“Y-Yah, why don’t you say anything? Am I talking to a statue?” Yesung changed his tone.

Why should I talk to you?

You glanced towards Yesung and went into the lawn, straight a way to the house.

“I’m serious”

Again, Yesung’s words stopped you.

Yesung walked forward and stand right behind you before the gate.

“Saranghaeyo. See you tomorrow. Jalja.”

You opened your eyes widely when you heard Yesung confessed his feeling. You thought you might be mistaken about what had your heard. You turned your back and saw no one. Yesung just leaved.

On the next morning, there was no Yesung in the class. As you thought, he must be kidding on you last night. But as soon as the teacher brought news of disaster which Yesung had killed in an accident, your tears suddenly brimmed the eyes. Your heart was broken. You just realized that you already make hope to meet him on that morning. You had waiting for him since the last time you met him on the previous night. You just noticed about your feeling towards Yesung.

“Y-Yesung. Yesung. Yesung-ah.” For the first time, you used your voice calling for that guy. Yet he was not there to hear it.

The pupils went to your place and calm you. But it was not them you need on that time. You only need a guy who used to disturb and trouble you to calm you. A guy who lent his back for you to hide. And a guy who fall for you and make you fall for him then. A guy with name Yesung.

You attended the burial ceremony of RIP Yesung at his parents’ house. There you gazed at his picture at a long time with a broken heart and brimming eyes. On your way out, you saw a lady with basket of clothes went to somewhere. Yet you noticed a shirt with colour splash on it.

“Excuse me.” You approached the lady.

The lady stopped and turned her face to you.

“Whose clothes are these? Where do you want to bring them?”

“These are the young master’s clothes. Madam asked me to gather and throw them out.” The lady explained.

“Throw out?” You felt uneasy when heard that Yesung’s clothes going to throw out. “I’m sorry. Can I’ve this? Keep this as a secret, jebal.” You took a shirt with that colour splash on it. It was a shirt that Yesung wore on the day you accidentally splashed the water with colours on it.

“Yae. I’ll keep this secret.”

“Kamsahabnida.” You bowed to the lady.

You brought the shirt home and spent all the time staring at that dirty shirt. Your fingers played with each inch of the shirt. You then had an idea to renew the shirt. You painted a dark street with many street lamps on its side and a couple showing their backs walked on the street by holding hands on the shirt. The street instead the couple referred to the last night you met Yesung.

“This is for you, Yesung. Mianhae.”

You are like the dirt of the colours that gets onto my shirt. It is awful and hard to erase. The longer I let it be, at last an image is drawn. You colour my life. And I am the canvas.


The longer I wrote this, the more I lack of ideas. Eheks!


Hari Yang Terakhir

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Image result for girl alone
Darah ini masih merah
denyut jantung dapat dirasa
akal ini masih bermimpi
jejak tapak masih berbunyi
bibir masih ada bicara
hati penuh sejuta rasa
mata menyaksikan
telinga mendengarkan

Detik waktu asyik bernyanyi
siang malam masih berganti
azan menggegar langit
iqamat mula menyumpit
basah wuduk lima anggota
terpadam api tenanglah jiwa
kalamullah yang menikam
doa hamba berjaga malam

Masihkah esok akan kembali?
Pastikah subuh menyapa lagi?
Andai jam tiga nafas terhenti
qiamullail tiada terdiri
tiada hidup jasadnya lagi
roh meninggalkan bumi
jasad bernama si mati

Hari itulah
hari yang terakhir.

Dalam bulan Ramadhan yang mulia ini, ada hamba yang dijemput pergi. Itulah iktibar kepada yang hidup. Jadikanlah Ramadhan ini Ramadhan yang terakhir yang tiada kembalinya lagi. Untunglah bagi hamba yang dijemput Allah pada bulan ini. Bagaimana jika ini Ramadhan yang terakhir tetapi bukan hari ini kita dijemput pulang? Untungkah kita? Atau tergolong dalam mereka yang rugi?? Innalillahi wainnailaihi roji'un


Coca Cola Met The Doom!

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mood: campaign

Uits! Dear fellow friends especially muslims, adakah anda menonton Edisi7 pada tengah hari tadi? Kalau ada tonton, sure korang dah dapat detect what I'm going to write here. Yeah! Tajuk post pun sudah cukup dijadikan pembayang. Yep. This is about that company yang sedang mengalami kerugian kini.

I am not going to write so long. Cuma hendak bertanya, how do you feel, muslims? What's your reaction? Or maybe action? Farahin ketika terdengar berita yang sadis ini, dengan tubuh yang keletihan sebab baru lepas balik dari sekolah, menepuk tangan seolah-olah Harimau Malaya telah menjaring gol sedebik! Haha. Clap clap, clap clap. Start dari itu, Farahin senyum sahaja memanjang sehingga ke bathroom. Huhu

Boys, girls, ladies and gentlemen, adakah ini barakah buat kita sempena bulan Ramadhan yang mulia ini? Kalau ya, Subhanallah! I don't know what to say anymore other than that. Teruskan usaha dan doa kita wahai mukminin sekalian. Islam pasti menang. Islam pasti menang. Islam pasti menang. Sehingga itu, I stop here and Selamat Menjalani Ibadah Puasa! InshaAllah lauk-pauk sedap akan melayan anda ketika berbuka nanti. Huhu

Do you still remember this?
This could be an optical illusion?
Or might be has the meaning?
Anyway, everything made for reasons, right?


Hidup Susah Tanpa Yang Tersayang

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EunHae in the house!

Assalamualaikum and Jalja!
Hidup susah tanpa yang tersayang. Apakah yang terlintas di fikiran anda apabila terbacakan tajuk post ini? Cinta? Keluarga? Anyway, what I'm going to write about is both. Including Friends also. Huhu. Ups! Don't stress yourselves. This is just a simple post. Hee 

Yay! Finally, I just bought new pens this evening. Faber Castle 0.7. Made In Malaysia tahu. lol. Sebenarnya, sudah berminggu Farahin kehabisan pen untuk menulis. Bila buat homework, terpaksa guna pen yang gemok gemok keras macam balak kembung. Sakit jari. Huhu

So this morning ketika subjek Sejarah, the teacher was absent. So, everyone buat hal-hal sendiri. Farahin pun siapkanlah mana-mana homework yang tertunggak macam bangunan separuh siap. Oleh sebab sudah terlalu lama menulis, letih, Farahin pun merungut.

Me: Haih. Susah hidup tanpa benda yang kita sayang.
Raidah: Apa?
Me: Apa?
Raidah: Apa yang benda awak sayang?
Me: Pen ni lah. Tak best tulis pakai pen lain. Pen Faber Castle dah habis. Huh!

Jadi begitulah ceritanya. I've used writing using Faber Castle 0.7.  And the colour, make sure it is blue. Sepanjang ketiadaan Faber Castle berdakwat biru, I've to use Faber Castle berdakwat hitam and sometimes pen yang gemok gemok kembung tu. Peh! Kelabu mata. Haha.

Farahin sejak kecil memang sangat suka kumpul alat tulis. Kalau pergi shopping, alat tulis mesti kena view. Tak beli pun tak apa. Like other girls says, Window-shopping! Huhu. Alat tulis antara benda kesayangan Farahin. Merekalah kawan, cinta dan keluarga. Hee

Farahin anti tengok pencil case bersepah. Sometimes, alat tulis mesti akan disusun macam buku-buku di library yang perlu diselenggara. Kalaupun tidak dikemas, Farahin akan berasa serabut seolah-olah rumah Farahin yang bersepah. Huhu.

Okey. Itu sahaja ceritanya. Nothing fun. Just a simple thing. So apakah benda kesayangan anda yang tanpanya hidup anda terasa susah? Hmm let me guess. Spectacles? Huhu. I need it too. Stokin? Me too. Hehe.

Believe Or Not : I wears socks in the house. Why? My legs are very sensitive to cold. Huhu ^^



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Kala ketawa riang menggegar langit
diri ini terasa kecil
walau kesedihan ini mencurah
tiada terisi lopak yang cetek
bagai pari-pari tanpa sayap
bukan dunia tidak adil
tapi terlalu berat untuk diterima
terasa langit menghempap kepala.

Seronok tengok Kejayaan. Sayangnya, diri ini bukan di antaranya. Mungkin suatu hari nanti pasti. =) *positive thinker


Inikah Pejuang Negara?

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Hey, guys! Sudah seminggu Farahin tak post anything. Anyway, today I've a short story to tell you guys. Semalam, as usual every Friday Farahin akan bertugas di library sekolah pada waktu petang. Then, semasa hendak balik ketika Farahin and my friend di parkir kenderaan hendak ambil motosikal, ada sebuah feri askar lalu di hadapan sekolah. Well, memang normal bila petang ada feri lalu. But then, suddenly I heard sound like something fall onto the road. Oh sh*t! Seorang askar yang berada di bahagian belakang feri dengan selamba sakainya membuang bekas minuman plastik ke atas jalan. I realised that I was fasting but berangnya Farahin memang tidak dapat di tahan. Farahin pun dengan selamba badak cakap, "Bangang punya askar! Lu sayang negara ke tidak?" Farahin tidaklah menjerit ke arah askar itu, but harap juga kalau dia dengar. Sudah dewasa tua bangka pun tak tahu jaga kebersihan negara. Well, Farahin pun tiadalah pembersih sangat. Bilik selalu bersepah but at least Farahin tiadaklah mencemarkan kebersihan tanahair. Duhh! Anyway, dia tu dahlah askar. Sudah tetulis di dahi dia, "Berkhidmat Untuk Negara". Tapi ini yang dia buat. Inikah pejuang negara?

Post ini bukan untuk mengutuk mana-mana pejuang tanahair. Ini cuma untuk mereka yang perasan pejuang tapi tak ada semangat jihad pun. Siapa yang makan cili, mesti terasa pedasnya.

ps: how's the new look of SJelfFoundland? Belum siap ni =)


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rindu cik abangku seorang ini..

Aku duduk berbual kosong dengan seorang kawan. Tiba-tiba datang seorang lelaki membawa senyuman berserta jajan durian di tangan. Dengan selamba, dia duduk di hadapan aku sambil mengunyah jajan durian.

Aku kenal dia. Dia kenal aku juga. Tapi kami tak pernah bersemuka. Apatah lagi, bersapa. Tak pernah sekali duduk bersama. Hanya bertegur di FB sahaja. Dia mencelah perbualan kami dengan tiba-tiba. Seolah-olah dia dah duduk bersembang lama.

Aku melilaukan pandangan tanpa arah tuju. Entah kenapa rasa segan untuk memandang lelaki itu. Aku malas nak layan perasaan aku yang aku sendiri tak tahu. Dia galak bersembang kosong dengan kawan aku. Sedikit sebanyak, aku mencelah konon tunjuk peramahlah gitu.

Dia mempelawa kami menjamah jajan durian. Aku mungkin segan dengan dia tapi pasal jajan durian apa aku heran. Tangan demi tangan bersilangan menjamah jajan durian. Masing-masing mengikut giliran. Sebungkus makanan ringan dikongsi tiga sekawan. Kawan?

Hanya sekejap dia duduk bersama kami. Tak lama itu dia ingin mengundurkan diri. Dengan murah hati, jajan durian diberikan kepada kami. Aku teruja dapat junk food free. Maklumlah, durian runtuh di tengah hari.

Lelaki itu sebaya kami. Calon SPM, sama-sama terima badi. Kawan-kawan suka ketawakan wajah dia yang tak menarik hati. Apabila aku dengar semua itu, aku cuma senyum diamkan diri. Aku tak rasa wajah dia kurang sana sini. Wajahnya sama cantik, sama padan dengan anggota-anggota yang telah Tuhan beri.

Kalau kacak, akhlak tiada, tiada gunanya.
Kalau manis bicara, hati tiada, lebih baik mati sahaja.


Biar Sampai Lusuh

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Kami sedang menaiki tangga untuk ke kelas. Aku dibuntuti seorang pelajar lelaki yang berbeg galas, rakan sekelas. Sedikit demi sedikit, langkahnya seperti lemas. Sama seperti aku yang seakan tak cukup nafas. Aku terpandangkan seluar pelajar lelaki itu di mana bahagian kakinya sudah tertetas. Malah turut berambu-rambu seperti kapas.

Teringat pula aku ketika beratur di perhimpunan sambil duduk di astaka. Bersebelahan pelajar lelaki itu ada seorang pelajar lelaki Cina. Kemejanya sudah kelabu asap seakan kepudaran warna. Ini mesti kes pakai baju lama. Aku tak kisah pun kalau dah memang itu gaya dia. Kalau itu yang dia suka.

Teringat lagi aku kepada sebuah artikel yang pernah dibaca. Katanya lelaki suka menggunakan sesuatu barang sehingga buruk, lusuh, hilang rupa. Tak apa. Tidaklah membazir namanya. Tapi bukan aku nak cerita pasal harta benda. Tak juga pasal apa yang lelaki suka atau tak suka. Tapi pasal sesuatu yang mungkin seumpamanya.

Lelaki buaya, manis kata, memang berbahaya di zaman ini. Mereka buat perempuan macam tuala mandi. Sudah pakai, dicampak entah mana pergi. Terdetik di hati. Why not lelaki buat perempuan macam pakaian yang tiada ganti? Gunalah sampai buruk, lusuh, lebih baik sampai mati.

Jadikanlah perempuan seperti pakaian yang susah untuk dibeli, diperolehi, dimiliki. Jadikanlah perempuan umpama pakaian yang akan membuat lelaki malu kalau tidak memakainya nanti. Biarkanlah ia dekat dengan diri. Melekap di hati. Jadikanlah perempuan umpama kain kafan untuk mati.

Jadikanlah perempuan umpama dompet. Diperlukan untuk menyimpan wang agar tidak dicopet. Dihargai sungguhpun ada yang lebih cantik di pasaran berderet-deret. Bawalah dia di sisi sungguhpun  hanya ke market. Jangan disia-siakan sehingga menangis hatinya, mata jadi sepet. Jiwa jadi senget.

Perempuan hatinya luluh. Sifatnya patuh. Tidak angkuh. Namun begitu, orangnya mudah mengeluh. Ketabahannya tidak bererti kesakitannya sudah sembuh. Walaupun begitu, hatinya cekal seperti tenaga buruh. Wahai lelaki, sayangilah perempuanmu meskipun dia sudah lusuh. Biar sampai lusuh.

Love for Live. Not Live for Love.

ps: Happy Birthday to my ex! Moga menjadi lelaki yang hebat! =)



Do pay a visit to my shop ya ! =D -18/09/2020-