Assalamualaikum...
Hello, peeps! I think I would skip the long greeting today.
Enjoy your reading time! =)
To feel grateful and have gratitude, one of the ways is to remind ourselves of others people problems rather than complaining our own. Some of us would have complains about their family matters but then they remind themselves of someone's family matters such as divorce, abuse, poverty, and death. Of course there are much more complains not only family matters but what I would like to convey here is to those people who are still using this method and it really works, you do a very good job. Not everyone can be empathy to anyone.
However, I realized that this method may not helpful to some others. I may be included. Previously, long ago this method worked like magic and blessing to me. But recently, it doesn't works as much as I really want it. Gratitude is no more easy. To those some others, who are feeling the grief, helpless, and hopeless, you have done nothing wrong. Your problems are matter. Your complains are worth to be heard.
Maybe not all of us, maybe I, had done this "gratitude act" wrongly. I gave my best thought over people's problems and complains. The least I can do were listening and trying to understand their pains as much as possible. While at the moment, I pushed back my own complains and forced it into silent. All because of the idea "there is someone who are in more pain than I do. So, I should have stop complaining and keep it low." I disapproved my own complains when I approved others'.
How I want to say it to myself so much, that this is not normal. Because what normal is when you thought of someone's less you will learn to be grateful of what you're having now. But to admit this is not normal, I feel like I will add more disapproval towards myself. As if everything I had done was all wrong and only worth endless apologies. Even at this moment while I am writing this post.
To those who are feeling the same way I do, maybe we did things wrong but that's okay. At this moment, it's okay to vent our complains. It's okay to feel our problems are the worse. Maybe I, maybe we, don't belong to the first group. Maybe we are in the other group, who can focus on both our and other people problems. We listen to both our and their sides. Because to us, no one has less or more worse. What worse is worse.
Fairness is not a part of a whole, but a whole of many parts.
